If I hadn’t lived the life I’ve led, I wouldn’t be the man I am.
Sounds a little “mind-twisty” at first. But then the truth of the words sink home.
There are no free passes in this life. We all have our stuff. Wounds. Fears. Hopes. Regrets. You don’t get to be my age without lugging around a whole bunch of regrets. For a whole bunch of years. Regret is as thief. It steals the future to pay a bill in the past that is way overdue. A bill, however, that can never be repaid, but can only be forgiven.
And forgiveness is a very rare treasure.
So when those words—If I hadn’t lived the life I’ve led, I wouldn’t be the man I am.—fell into my brain recently, slid into my heart and worked into my spirit, a light went on. And regret was banished.
I could not, would not, be who I am now if I hadn’t been who I was then. And that guy back then was no prize. I carried a lot of his baggage for much of my life. Regrets for things done; things not done. Regrets for promises broken and for promises never made. A litany. A smorgasbord.
Regrets from the past.
I can’t change the past. None of us can. But I don’t have to grieve the past any longer, either. I don’t have to carry that incredibly heavy weight of disappointment and regret any longer.
The old man is dead. And the new man is here. And there is no way that new man could have any life at all if the old man had not also lived. A conundrum. (Love that word.)
But thank you, Jesus. The blood of Christ has washed away every sin. Conquered every past. Vanquished every regret. And we can walk in freedom … set free from every past mistake and all of our regrets. Because of a gift called grace.
My dear friend, James Leonard, wrote this in the Foreword for my new book, Rescuing Hidden Hearts.
“It has been many years since Terry discovered the secret of overcoming the lies that crippled his walk with God and nearly destroyed his family, but God had healed his marriage and was taking back large swaths of land that the enemy had stolen. Everyone in the group knew that Terry had tapped into something we all needed.
“Much of what Terry outlines in his book Rescuing Hidden Hearts was at the core of his discovery and the DNA for our men’s accountability group. Now he’s subjecting the enemy to yet another rebuke by making it accessible to everyone through his book Rescuing Hidden Hearts . . .
“Terry’s life was forever changed by his whole-hearted submission to the Holy Spirit and his learning to trust and obey. His testimony provides a template for how God rescues hearts. What eluded me for so long (even as a pastor) is now available to all. What a gift!”
The photo above was taken from our back deck last week (October 30, 2024). We live at the top of a ridge. We have great sky views. And, each October, the sun and the sky and the clouds collude in just the right ways to dazzle us with spectacular sunsets that simply sing of the depth of God’s creative beauty.
And that’s us. You and me. The depth of God’s creative beauty. He created us. He loves us and wants all of us to live the lives He created for us to live. Regardless of the past. Rejoicing in the present. In rich expectation of the future.
Delivered from all regret. He has me here. He has me here for a purpose. And I’m not done yet.
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